blein:

sO my friend’s dog died and she lives in new york city and so she had to take it to the vet by the subway and she put the dead dog in the suitcase on the subway and it was a pretty big dog and some dude saw that she was struggling with the suitcase so he asked if she needed help with it and he said do you mind me asking what’s in it and she didnt want to say a dead dog so shE SAID IT WAS A BUNCH OF LAPTOPS SO HE TOOK THE SUITCASE AND RAN AND I JUST 

(via animatedanarchy)

“Hang the eucalyptus upside down by tying it to your shower head with twine. When you run your shower, the steam will rise up towards the eucalyptus, filling your bathroom with the most refreshing, relaxing scent. Plus, the added greens are lovely on the eyes. You’ll definitely feel a little closer to nature.”

sweeneytad:

*dentist slaughters family in front of you*

they’re bleeding because you don’t floss

(via mothipede)

colfricans:

why have gender roles when you could have pizza rolls

(Source: mlissuh, via mothipede)